flickerfade.org

i’m reading mark haddon’s the curious incident of the dog in the night-time at the moment, and that’s what the boy’s told to do. he doesn’t. sort of. well it depends on what you mean by trouble. actually there is a twist early in the book (without ruining it) that feels weird. it’s not explicit dramatic irony, yet it’s supposed to be easy to figure out. it’s like knowing something nobody has ever known before, if that makes sense. like life research. you beat the boy to it, you see something in someone nobody else sees.

i was thinking this morning that it’s nice to hear nice things about yourself from other people. but it’s even nicer when you reach the point where don’t need to hear them, because these nice things people are mentioning are true all the time. that’s another goal in my life. to be good. so people don’t have to tell me “you’re good” or whatever all the time. that’s self-confidence–to know what you are capable of, and to go out there and take advantage of your ability.

so a little update on what this week has held.

i picked up my diploma. it’s awesome, but yet very, very anticlimactic, because if you don’t go to commencement, you just go to the registrar’s office to grab it. i got food poisoning, five days after spraining my ankle.

i watch things. i watch them break, and then reassemble, and then break. we should save ourselves some effort here. i also watch ballroom dancing. it’s pretty interesting. i didn’t know there were both american and international styles.

and somewhere in there, i decided, i should let people tell me about their lives. so i started a new website. because i haven’t told all my friends, i’m going to let it just stew a few days longer.

i seem to always have a houseguest too. strange.

and i didn’t log in. i had something to say, but i can’t remember what it was. i just knew i couldn’t post while at work. as my formal hiring date creeps closer i’m not sure what to make of the way my life is going. hell, you’d think i’d have a lot to say after a busy weekend, but really i don’t. i’m being pulled apart slightly.

i guess that’s a part of being yold. yold. like me. and most likely, you. there’s only like five readers here, and you’re all my age.

(yeah i’m trying to get this word in the dictionary, you can ask maxine about that, whom i saw this weekend, by the way. exciting! also seoul garden is a fantastically good and cheap restaurant in k-town. it is cheaper than koreana.)

i guess it’s also a part of having all this energy and not knowing where to put it. it probably doesn’t help that i sprained my ankle, which is gonna slow me down for at least a few days. or maybe it will help. because i have to slow down. actually maybe it will help to get out of the office before 9, which is likely to happen tomorrow, so i can draw at the bar or at home or wherever i feel like going. i kind of want to design something for silkscreening. seems random. not sure why i thought of that. i still need to come up with some kind of NOT UGLY design for this site.

(so back to the parens. anyway, i sprained my ankle playing football, but i did manage to nick the winner carrying my injury. it’s not as bad as i thought it was this morning, but i might need to keep my bedroom warmer so it doesn’t stiffen up. landlord’s paying for the utilities and she’s one of those super green folks. also, my apartment is not technically an apartment, which is good and bad. one bad thing is that i don’t have a thermostat. or smoke detectors. actually i should take care of that, stat.)

anyway, yold. tell your friends.