flickerfade.org

i should have called.

that’s all. i shouldn’t forget the people who made a big difference in my life. and to put things in perspective, only ten people or so have made a huge difference. but everyone makes some difference, and i don’t always appreciate it. so here goes, here’s to you.

dr. hackler is apparently doing better than i thought, at least according to my internet search. the man delivers meals on wheels, and he is 85 now. flickerfade is actually the fourth hit for his name. i bet a lot of students are still remembering him.

being tired amplifies guilt. i am so tired. will i feel this way after i’ve had a nap? probably not. that sucks. i have to remember this. for some reason this guilt makes me lose faith in probably half of my friends as i watch how they act. do they feel guilty when they make mistakes like this too? i think of that ben franklin quote again. it’s easy to confound what is best for yourself. and you can find out the strangest things at six o’clock in the morning. sorry. i’ve been accused of this kind of behavior several times myself. i need to prove these people wrong, not just for myself, but because it’s the right thing. you only get what you give.

but hey, starbucks has improved this generally crappy day. i’m looking forward to 5 pm when i either pass out, go running, or go lift weights. i love running in the rain, it’s the smell that counts. we almost had oklahoma rain yesterday, but this place just isn’t the same when it comes to downpours.

yeah of all things, starbucks. and that e.l.o. song off the eternal sunshine of the spotless mind soundtrack. (that dvd came out yesterday! hmm.)

on top of my 6.046 problem set, that is. nap time. i am strong, i can do it without office hours. sort of. but i wish they’d post the solutions so i can see what the hell i’ve done wrong!

i got my battery for my camera’s light meter. unfortunately, i don’t have a known working meter to check if it’s right! so we’ll see if this roll works out.

i still haven’t made that pinhole camera. boo on me. hell, i still haven’t done a lot of things. in fact, i am procrastinating right now. i also ate a boca burger, which had no taste and no condiments because the burger dude forgot them.

i want to be the best man somewhere, at a wedding, i mean. do i know anybody at all that well? do i even go to weddings? the last time i went to one was something like seven years ago. i remember another one in particular where they had purple-coloured white chocolates monogrammed with the initials of the bride and groom. i ate so many of those that night. it’s weird to know engaged people. in my whole life i’ve probably been to four weddings and no funerals. hope only the first number increases.